December 21, 2018
There are so many words left unsaid. I thought this would get a little less painful. It only evolves into a deeper, darker pain. Its like a traumatic injury, and it is. You get terribly injured. At first, the pain is dulled by shock. Then it blossoms into a bouquet of agony. Time does not heal the wounds, physical or emotional. They are the same. Each looks better on the outside as time moves on. But, there is always the throbbing pain that still remains in the bones, skin, in the heart and soul. Less sharp, less raw than when we were first injured. But, deeper and ever lingering. It only takes a rainy day, or a movement, or nothing at all, and the physical pain flares. And so its the same, The pain of loss sits on our hearts and minds like a healing wound that it forever getting ripped open, healing, rip, healing, rip....and so on. Never really healing, but never as raw as when first inflicted. See? The soul is forever changed, as the body is in the physical. Scars of the body and scars of our hearts. I will never recover fully from this mortal wound. I am closer to the dead, than to the living.
Only death will heal this wound.
I love you, my son.
Always always, always, always.....
Infinity times Infinity.
MamaDukes
Can you hear me?
Please let it be so
This made me sob and hide my face in my pillow with the sharp recoil of that familiar pain of it ringing through me. I know you feel this way all the time, and if only i could take it from you, but i can't, so i promise to always bear witness and remember Frankie with you
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