I miss this beautiful face. I miss this wonderful humor.
                                                                  I miss this awesome Man.

7/19/17

Frankie?

The DOOR!

It opened.

And closed.

Two times.

I thought.

“Its Pops”.

Forgot something.

No one there.

I asked.

He said,

"Not me!

I swear!"

He thought,

He heard

Me, banging.

I said,

"Not Me!

I swear!"

I saw

it open,

then shut!

Two times!

I WATCHED!

It open

And SHUT!

I KNOW

It’s YOU!

You’ve
come

home
again....

7/10/17

Jackies new "bureau". I am so sorry, but the Ikea one you bought was falling apart, and this was such an awesome gift from a coworker. Its right up your alley as well. I showed Jackie the "secret" cupboard for his special things....lol...he is so much like you, Frankie.....I love you with all my heart, my son. -Mama

7/10/17
Was it you, Frankie? I know you came to Aunt Lilly in the hospital. It had to be you. I know our human brains are probably like single cell organisms compared to you now. But, I believe you came through to her, and that you are watching over us all. I try to stay open and "listen" for you. I miss you, my sweet comrade.....always and forever, Mamadukes.

May 24, 2017

Sarah had a baby boy on May 22, 2017.
I am happy for them, and the baby is beautiful. His name is James Walter Baird-Weglinski.
I had thought they might have thought of giving him your name as his middle name.
I don't know why, I just had hoped.
They are all happy and doing well. I am glad for that.
But, these things only serve as reminders that time is marching on, without you. I know we all have to die someday, but you left an very unfinished life behind.
But, I know you watched over her during that night. I know you watch over all of us, always.
I miss you so much, I almost cannot bear another breath. I have so much in my heart that I cannot give words to. Its is overwhelming and hopeless. This world is diminished, without you in it.
I hope we will all meet again. So many things I want to say, so many things.

Most of all that it is not fucking fair. You got cheated. I hate that, it makes me crazy. I could go insane with these thoughts . I am rageful and simmering contantly underneath my smile. I FUCKING HATE LIVING WITHOUT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate it! I FUCKING HATE IT

Frankie, I KNOW you would be laughing right now....KNOWING how TRUE this is, It's ME RIGHT?!? I love you son, and I miss the little things we used to share. They were as important as the big events.....Wait for us.

5/19/17

4/13/17

Pops and I spent your birthday doing some of the things you liked. We celebrate your life, on your birthday, and everyday. But, on your birthday, I always find my way to the beach. I feel you there.
I miss you so much my son. It hurts. It hurts so fucking bad. I love you, Kid. 8 x 8

03/17/17

I miss you more than all the stars in the multiverse. My soul, my heart, my mind, my being is shattered. I am lost, and losing my will to stay. Please, Frankie. Please....you can't be dead. My boy can't be dead. In an instant, dead. Dead. DEAD.,

3/2/17



Please......

3/2/17

I love you infinitum, my beautiful son......8x8 (infinity times infinity) Remember?

2/2/17

Somedays, I believe.
other days, I don't....
I miss you.

1/27/17

1/20/17


I hear you...

1/17/17


I heard you the other day speaking to me when I left the house. At least, I want to believe it was you. Its hard, Frankie. The hardest thing I have ever had to do, and it just never ends. The new hurdles that come up. I guess its all part of it. But, I feel like he has everything he needs with them. I try to stay here for you. Because of my love for you, Jackie, Pops and Lilly. I dont want to be here. But I dont want to leave them. I guess I will eventually be with you in my own time. But, then, why delay the inevitable? What is the point of this measley little life? Really. Can you give me an answer, because I cant think of any meaning in life. Not anything that is worth anything. I dont know. I miss you, I love you so much my son. I love you so much, and I am being crushed by the weight of this loss. I hide it. I hide it, but I cant stand it, I just want to see you again. I have to go, I love you. Watch over your Pops on the road tonight, the rain is bad. But, then...you probably know that, and so much more. Or, not...

01/12/17

I miss you, my son.....

01/04/17


fRANKIE,
i CAN'T. i CAN'T. tHIS WORLD IS SO FUCKE3D UP. THE TORTURE OF POOR DEFENSELESS CHILDREN, ANIMALS, EACH OTHER. THE ISIS MONSTERS TAKE PLEASURE IN PAIN, AND A rELIGION THAT PREACHES TO KILL IN SUBTLE SUBTLE WAYS....PLEASE pLEASE i DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ANYMORE. iTS TOO BIG. iTS TOO SAD AND BRUTAL, AND TOO BROKEN